Time is of the Essence // Patience in Eternal Things

So this is my first real 'adventure' post, telling you a little bit about what goes on in our life. But as always, I must put a moral and lesson at the end of it. Typical.

Today was Trenton's 11th Birthday. The plan was to go to the Temple, and then go swimming. So at 8:30, we hopped on a bus and headed to the Coca Cola Bus Station. An hour later, we arrived. We hopped on another bus, headed to Heredia, where the Temple is located. TWO AND A HALF HOURS LATER, we arrived. Throughout that entire three and a half hours (spelled out for emphasis), the thought "Time is of the Essence. Time is of the Essence" pounded through my head, almost obsessively. I was mad, hot, numb from sitting on such a hard surface for so long, and sorry for my brother, as he was spending his birthday inside a public bus. Not fun. I wondered WHY IN THE WORLD THIS WAS TAKING SO LONG. Why, as we are traversing to the House of the Lord, were we having such bad luck? Why was this happening?

When we finally arrived at the Temple, we were famished. Three hours in a bus will do that to you. So we walked around looking for a Soda, a traditional mom and pop restaurant. After a half hour of walking, we couldn't find ANYTHING. So we popped in at a supermarket, got some bread and soda. Nutritional 101. However, that didn't fill us up, so we stopped in a super expensive restaurant, as it was the only other thing around. After an over priced, not so good meal, Dad announced that the Temple closed at 1. And it was 12:45. It didn't open again til 5 in the evening. I wanted to cry. We decided to resort to plan #2. The swimming pool. Unbeknownst to us, there was no swimming pool in Heredia, even though Google Maps said so. So we stopped at the Family History Center to fill up our water bottles. Then we hopped on a bus back home.

We had this plan, to get off before Coca Cola and catch a bus to El Curio, about a mile from our house, so we could save about an hour. But our bus never came. So we caught one to San Antonio, three miles from our house. The entire trip home took about 2 hours. I had no idea why. We tried to go to the Temple and worship the Lord, it didn't work out. We tried to do a wholesome recreational activity. It didn't work out. We ate food to not die at a ridiculously expensive price. We tried to celebrate Trenton's birthday so that way his day didn't completely suck. It took a lot longer than it should have.

As I was sitting in my bed, exhausted, frustrated, and confused, a thought came to my mind. Sometimes, when we try to obey the Lord and follow his commandments, the World tries to defeat us. It beats us down and throws us around like we're nothing. It tries to convince us that it's not worth it. The Gospel isn't true. But it is. And God always wins. And sometimes it's okay to fail doing God's work. Because it tests us. It tests our faith, our love for God. So we have to have patience. Patience in Eternal Things. Because in a eternal perspective, a flop of a day is nothing. A mere blink of an eye. If that.

I thought my day was wasted. I thought I had been unproductive, and not learned a single thing. But I did. I learned that time is only wasted if you let it be wasted. Even if your time does not produce fruits of goodness, you always learn something. The other thing I learned is that you must, you MUST, have patience in Eternal things. When you say a prayer, God doesn't always answer immediately. Sometimes it's okay to fail doing the Lord's work. Because you never really fail. When you are with God, God is always with you. And God. Always. Conquers.

Savannah

Regret

Hi yes, it's me, and I'm back again. Like 5 hours later. BUT I HAVE SO MANY THOUGHTS SPINNING AROUND IN MY HEAD AND I NEED TO ORGANIZE THEM. NOW.

Today I would like to talk about regret. Regret is a horrible thing. It eats you up from the inside out and makes your heart ache. The regret I've been feeling mostly these past two days is from my first year of Highschool, Freshman year.

For those of you who don't know, I attended Williamsburg Academy in 7th grade, then skipped 8th grade and jumped straight into High School. Ohhhhh man. At first I was excited, and then my stress levels rose, and rose, and rose. In the first two weeks I had 4 mental breakdowns, and 7 emotional breakdowns, approximately. I managed to make it through the first month alive. I was stressed, slightly depressed, and very anxious. I did however, conquer my fears and limitations. I grew to be a better person. But I was so focused on my Education, that I didn't even think about making friends. Not once. Looking back, I didn't want to make friends. I just wanted to survive.

So that's what I did. I merely survived. Before I move on, let me just say, NEVER, EVER, E V E R, MERELY SURVIVE. LIVE. THRIVE. LEARN. GROW. EXPAND. MEET NEW PEOPLE. Thank you. That is all.

Anyways. I studied for midterms and finals. I did my assignments and got A's. I made it into a few class presidencies. I learned, somewhat. But I didn't take full advantage of what I had. Beautiful lessons. Beautiful people. Beautiful opportunities. I wasted it all.

Then, at the very end of the semester, I got an email from Ben Brown, one of my amazing mentors. I owe him so much. He basically said, "hey. This is my last semester teaching debate. I would like you to join."
So I did. I had nothing to lose. No friends. Good grades. A free enough schedule. At the very beginning of the second semester, I vowed to expand, not just survive. So I went to debate class. My first impression was, "Crap." All of the popular kids where in that class. People I had merely heard of, yet never met before. I was so scared. But, I made good of my promise, and thrived. My debate partner, Alyssa, is amazing and we are still good friends. She is the first friend I ever had in Williamsburg Academy. When we had our first debate, she asked a fellow debater if he would help us, as he was more experienced. We were productive for about 20 minutes. Then we just talked. That was a good time. Yet I wanted more friends. But I didn't know how to make them. Then, out of the blue, a certain person from this class added me on Snapchat. (I will not disclose names. Sorry :) ). We started talking. One thing led to another, and we became friends. Then I became friends with the previous mentioned debater helper.

So now I had three friends. I had learned a lot and debate was easily my favorite class. I loved it. Then, three days after the school year ended, I reached out to a fellow debater, who had just graduated, on Instagram. I had a question for her, and we had a zoom call. We hit it off. Immediately. Now she is one of my best friends and my roll model. I love her to death.

Then, I went to Elevation. There I met these amazing friends minus Alyssa in person, plus more people whom I love dearly. But most of these people are older than me and have many, many more friends than I do. They have a good group of their 'people', yet I felt kind of like I had butted my way in there. As I was stalking these people and many others I had met at Elevation on Instagram, (yes, chances are I stalked you. I have no shame) I began to feel sad. I had these good friends, but we aren't super close, and they aren't very many compared to the others. (Minus Lils. I love you).
So I got to thinking. What had happened if I had tried to make friends throughout the year? How could my life have changed? How many lives could I have touched? I could've been the leader. I could've gone first, reached out. I could have changed MY life.
But I didn't. And I don't like to say it, but I'm hating myself for it. I want summer to end, NOW, just so I can redeem myself. Prove to myself and others that I CAN make friends. I CAN focus and invest my energy and time into something other than my education and exclude my potential friends.

Now, I would like to say that I do have very good friends in Williamsburg. But NONE of them are in my graduating class. Half of them are graduating this school year. So I'm promising myself now, and throughout the rest of my High School career, that I will surround myself with good friends, who encourage and lift me up. I will reach out to those in need of a friend. I can be a better leader by being a better friend.

So my message and lesson for you today is, don't look back and feel regret. It's better to say, "oops", than "I wish...". Trust me.
Trust me.

-Savannah